steady storm

being still and doing nothing are two very different things.

be at peace with your friend,

be at peace with your lover,

be at peace with your family,

be at peace with yourself.

don’t let your own lies bring you down,

don’t let your own critique swallow you whole.

be steady,

be calm,

be honestly happy with you.

 

deleting instagram!! #1

Signed out,

deleted the app.

I’ll be updating my feelings and experiences in this 30 day journey! Even during the day itself, day and night, where I feel it is needed!

Decision:

Pretty sure you guys have already heard of the negative impacts of social media!

  • Obsessive relationship with your appearance
  • Diminishing quality of relationships in real life
  • Poorer productivity
  • Poor time management
  • Mental health issues

And more!! But these are the ones that affect me.

I just really want to spend my time in more meaningful things like spending time with family, soaking up experiences, and building on my own image without being narcissistic.

I actually did this once before in secondary school but instead, it was going without my phone for 3months AND THAT FELT SO GOOD!!

So yay okay πŸ™‚ wish me all the best!

Update!

am i actually maturing???

I wake up to yet another day; a new day.

But this time, I was different.

It wasn’t because of a dream,

or anything life-changing yesterday…

What changed was just…

me

How do I explain this?

I just woke up one day,

a random day out of all the days it could have been,

and decided to change my life.

As cliche as it sounds,

I wanted the change to start from me.

I didn’t want a traumatic event to change me,

or another person triggering a change in me…

I wanted to be responsible for my own life’s good outcomes.

#empowerment? #maturing?

Whatever it is,

I am really happy this is happening.

I shall do my best to keep this up!

//

I hope you’re happy for me.

I wish the same would happen to you too πŸ™‚

 

trust the earth

you are doing fine,

i promise,

as long as you choose to breathe for another day.

people around me have been dying or disappearing;

don’t you see it’s such a great gift to be alive?

trust the earth that for your sadness, happiness will come.

trust the earth that for your anguish, peace will grace you.

trust the earth that for all the days you chose to breathe, you will be rewarded with purpose.

i dry my eyes ’cause i don’t feel like crying

Love from others, hate from myself.

Today I had a realization that although my current state of mind is a product of compounded hurts, regrets and fears that may have involved someone else, I was the one who let it compound up over the years.

Yes, a friend did me wrong and I was hurt. But I had the choice to appreciate instead, the many other friends who love me so dearly and unselfishly.

Yes, a past boyfriend scarred me and left me broken. But I have a choice, not to cry everyday, and to patiently wait for the day I finally break free and tear down my walls again.

Yes, I might have failed in my academics in the past and felt inadequate. But I have the choice, to wear them as battle scars and push myself harder.

The list goes on…

I got this realization through a songΒ by Sigrid called “Don’t feel like crying” (See: Don’t feel like crying) and it really gave me strength in a way that it tells me that “yes, I can cry but do I really want to?”.

If you are feeling suffocated by many overwhelming emotions, take a break and listen to this. It might help!