control the need for control

grinding my teeth every night,

and as hard as i might,

i just can’t get through the sleepless nights.

schedules,

back to back,

anxiety,

my vision is black.

the fear of the unknown i take to my bed,

the fear of the known i keep in my head.

when will it stop?

when will i stop?

when will i stop and breathe happiness?

when will i stop and be happy?

 

drought in the sea

Spoilt for choice,

Spoilt with riches;

Spoilt people,

With many curses.

A simple life we crave,

But the opposite we face.

What people don’t know,

Is the reality we face;

Falling in love with prenups,

Growing up with handcuffs.

Even friends that gather,

Like vultures they weather,

And wait on your storm,

To get beautiful feathers.

A simple life we crave,

But truly, it’s the opposite we face.

fish on dry land

I’m gasping,

gasping so hard for air.

I suffer everyday,

yet I pull through,

thinking about the water;

How calming the water to feel against my skin,

How a cold shock would revive my spine,

How it will wash all my worries all away.

Til’ then,

I wait,

in agonizing pain.

I long for the day,

I may rest there,

eternally.

 

 

Jane the Virgin

She’s bold and scared,

passionate and reserved;

How great would it be,

if I was like her.

As still as the lake,

as frantic as the rapids;

I’d love to be her,

this very minute.

Inspiring yet a lesson herself,

She’s everyone’s person;

I wish more people would know,

about Jane the Virgin.

//

In this time of turbulence in my life, lessons and feelings I got from watching the series really helped me get through. Everyone should go watch it πŸ™‚

 

 

 

do you?

oh all the time…

I avoid the places we know,

all the time,

because they scream your name,

and ask if I remember you.

I can’t lie to myself,

so I avoid them,

so that maybe,

just maybe,

I can get over you.

But,

actively avoiding those places,

makes the memory of you roar louder in my heart.

But hey,

tell me…

do you go through this too?