thank you, really

Thank you, for the late nights and the laughter.

Thank you, for all the stoning moments and helping me realize I have a bad girl side of me.

Thank you, for opening my eyes to the beauty of different people.

Thank you, for driving me places I have never been to before.

Thank you, for the whimsical moments of pure innocent romance.

Thank you, for letting me try durian despite my parents’ wishes.

Thank you, for the cuddles that made me feel safe.

Thank you, for pushing me out of my comfort zone and feeding me so much.

Thank you, for the surprises on normal and special days.

Thank you, for trying to be close to my family… that really meant a lot to me.

Thank you, for being my happy youth love.

Well,

I’d thank you for the sad things too, but I’d love to only have happy memories of you.

I’m finally just smiling when I accidentally remember you.

i kinda want to be a fish?

I feel like a fish out of water;

Anxiety coats my existence when I breathe on land.

My brain a mess of thoughts,

my body riddled with pain and flaws.

Who am I to the people I love,

who am I to myself?

I’d think myself into perpetual darkness and misery.

But when I submerge myself in water,

I feel at peace.

The world seems bigger,

and there I truly understand that I am in the obedience of something far greater than myself or any other human being.

I fall helplessly small,

yet I am calm,

and happy,

looking at the big ocean blue.

Oh how wonderful it would be,

to breathe those pristine waters in my next life?

am i actually maturing???

I wake up to yet another day; a new day.

But this time, I was different.

It wasn’t because of a dream,

or anything life-changing yesterday…

What changed was just…

me

How do I explain this?

I just woke up one day,

a random day out of all the days it could have been,

and decided to change my life.

As cliche as it sounds,

I wanted the change to start from me.

I didn’t want a traumatic event to change me,

or another person triggering a change in me…

I wanted to be responsible for my own life’s good outcomes.

#empowerment? #maturing?

Whatever it is,

I am really happy this is happening.

I shall do my best to keep this up!

//

I hope you’re happy for me.

I wish the same would happen to you too πŸ™‚

 

bye bye demons

With an average of 3 hours of sleep,

I brave through a new day, yet again.

I piggyback my demons as my angel hangs on to my heart,

as it remains pure through hell.

It shows potential…

My demons see that.

So they press on,

for years,

loving a good challenge.

I persist on too;

a war over my heart constantly shook my foundations.

Today, they finally lost.

Today, I get to sleep and rest my burdens.

Today, they lost,

because my heart is stronger than the shit you give me.

motivation boost

I’m having finals in a few days and here’s some motivation boost if you need some πŸ™‚

All the best to all of you hoomans out there!